Family’s Piety Lasts 12 Seconds After Leaving Church Parking Lot

Read the original article at The Babylon Bee (http://babylonbee.com/news/familys-piety-lasts-12-seconds-after-leaving-church-parking-lot/)

MARQUETTE, MI—The Granger family’s piety lasted for just 12 seconds after leaving the parking lot of 1st North Baptist Church Sunday, sources reported. Having enjoyed a sermon on 1 Peter 1:14-16 titled “Holiness In Our Lives” and having engaged in warm, loving conversation with friends on matters of church fellowship, the family of five’s reverie was almost immediately shattered as their Chrysler Town & Country minivan made its way home.

Despite the heartfelt emotion and resolve the worship service had engendered in parents Lloyd and Mary Granger, while the car was still turning onto the main road, their five-year-old son Hunter punched his brother Taylor “because [he] wanted to.” In turn, the eight-year-old took away his sibling’s “Jake and the Neverland Pirates” toy, resulting in a high-pitched, sustained yowling that in turn caused fifteen-year-old Sophie Granger to launch into a monologue about the low mental acuity of her younger siblings.

At just under 10 seconds, Mrs. Granger responded with a hissing rejoinder that everyone needed to turn around and “just stop it.” The Granger patriarch, whose thoughts were focused on how he was going to examine Peter’s exhortation to holiness within his workplace and personal life, was jarred out of his contemplations by this cacophony, and responded with a somewhat vague, angry threat of the regret all would feel if they did not listen to their mother “that instant.”

At this 12-second mark, any vestiges of piety in the minivan had been completely eradicated, resulting in a discordant row and personal sniping that only subsided when the warring family called a fragile cease-fire on the promise of lunch at Cracker Barrel.

By This, Everyone Will Know You Are My Disciples

It is spring time in Memphis, which means many things.  Graduations.  Spring cleaning.  Beginning of summer vacations.

It also marks the ending of the semester for EYC and youth group activities at Holy Communion.  Numbers in spring always seem to drop.  That is not just here at Holy Communion, it seems to be a very common theme amongst churches with youth programs.  Sport’s schedule pick up, school seems more rigorous, and to be honest, apathy begins to set in.

We start looking forward to the future, that we stop caring so much about the things that are important to us now.  More often than not, church seems to be one of the things pushed to the back burner.

One thing I have been doing over my time here at Holy Communion is move from asking, “What do we do here?” and change it into a “Why do we do this?”  What is the purpose of a church youth group?  Is it merely just a place for to send teenagers to be entertained and show them that church is not always boring? 

I think it is so much more!

I became the full time Minister to Youth in August of 2012, making this the first graduating class that I have seen all the way through high school.  In reflecting on the memories and stories of these past four years, it becomes clear as to why we do things.

We have been through a lot these past few years.  We have had our ups and downs.  When we started, we were still trying to discover our identity.  As people but also as a program.  What were we?  In the years that followed, we have seen a lot.  We have seen divorce, car accidents, cancer, and death.  Things that teenagers should not have to deal with. 

But each time something happened, that person was never alone in their struggle.  What were we?  We were a group, that bound together, and overcome every challenge that was thrown at us, and we did it together. 

But all that still seems to cover the what, where is the why?  To answer that question, I must share my story.

I came to Holy Communion in 2004 because I wanted to be a part of the youth program.  My old youth group had fallen apart and I wanted to be a part of one.  I liked youth group.  My friends went to Holy Communion and so I joined.  That became my group.  My core group of friends.  The place I felt like I was at home.  School was filled with so much judgment.  It mattered so much about what you did and who you hung out with and how you acted.  You could not just be yourself, you had to be who you thought other people wanted to be.  But being at church was different.  At school, I was quiet and shy.  I rarely spoke up.  I did not want to pretend to be someone that I wasn’t just to fit in, so I didn’t.  But that was not the case at church.  Ask anyone who was in youth group at that time, I was anything but quiet and shy.  Before coming to Holy Communion, I once dressed as Buddy the Elf and danced around the Nave during church to make an announcement about the Christmas Carnival the youth were hosting.  I felt comfortable at church.  I felt at home at the church.  I was not judged.  I could truly be myself.

That was the why. 

After college, many of my friends were a little surprised when they heard I had become a youth minister.  Telling people about my religion and my faith was never something I really did.  I always admired the people who lived out their faith.  It always seemed to me that the most vocal religious people, were the least religious.  I disagreed with them.

John 13:35 was one passage that always stuck out to me.  “By this everyone will know that you are my disciples, if you love one another.”

Not, that they will know because you tell them, but because of who you treat others.  How you behave.

If I can say one thing about the youth group over these past few years it is this…. They love each other.

There was a sermon I heard once about what the church really was.  They told a story, one that I can relate to very much, about saying good-bye after a church event.  He shared how he had taken a group of youth on a trip and spent an entire week with them.  When they returned back to the church, they all unloaded, got their bags, and were all set to go.  They said their good-byes then they all gathered around the van and talked.  No one wanted to leave.  They started to walk towards their cars, said their good-byes, and then gathered up again and talked.  Finally, after about 20 minutes, he told the kids they had to leave because he wanted to go home.  So they all said their good-byes, got in their cars, and went to dinner together.  They did not want to leave each other.  After the kids left, the adults said their good-byes and then laughed and joked about how they had just spent an entire week with each other and weren’t sick of other yet.  They did not want to leave either. 

THAT…. Is the church.  THAT is the why.

The relationships formed here are unlike anywhere else. 

The relationships formed here make you want to go to the church and hang out during youth group after spending an entire weekend at a youth retreat.  They are the kind of relationships that make you go to Gibson’s every Wednesday after church.  They are the kind of relationships that make you gather with your friends after school at the church to watch movies.  They have been there to support each other no matter what life threw at them.

Three years ago, I wrote a post about what I wanted and I thought the youth group here at Holy Communion…the saying I landed upon, Beacon of Christ.  You can read that post here- http://youngsterstheology.blogspot.com/search?q=be+the+light

Looking at the group we have this year and the relationships that have formed…I would say that they are doing just that…they are spreading the light of Christ to all those around them.

Youth Sunday Reflection

This past Sunday, we celebrated Youth Sunday at Church of the Holy Communion.  It is always a wonderful Sunday when the youth have a chance to show what they are able to do when given the spotlight.  On a normal Sunday, you will see the youth still involved with the service, typically as the acolytes and occasionally serving as a Eucharistic Ministers.  If you turn around, you may even see our one teenager who sings in the choir.  But one Sunday a year, the youth are given the keys to the service and asked to take over.

Even though this youth lead service would not take place until April 2016, work on this one service began in December 2015.  Through the months of January and February, our youth worked with the clergy of the church to learn about the Prayers of the People, the Eucharistic Prayer, the Lectionary, the liturgical calendar, how to select music for a service, vestments, you name it, we have learned about it.  Why?  Because that is what we need to know in order to prepare our service.  After learning about the Prayers of the People, the middle school class wrote their own.  After learning about the different parts of the Eucharistic Prayer, the high school class writes their own before sending it off to the Bishop for approval.  Seriously, how many high school students do you know that can diagram the different parts of the Eucharistic Prayer?!  And of course, there is your senior in high school youth preacher.

We also not only choose the music, but perform the music.  Over the past few months, a group of incredibly talented youth have worked together to learn all of the music the service, and perform it fantastically!  When was the last time you were moved to tears during the music at church?  When was the last time the congregation paused Communion to turn and give a round of applause for the music?

Youth Sunday is always a very stressful yet amazing day.  By the end of it, I always breathe a sigh of relief, and am thankful that I have another 365 days to prepare for the next one, but am also completely amazed and humbled by the experience.  Every single time the youth is tasked with a large job to do, they always seem to exceed expectations and watching them succeed at everything they are challenged with, makes me so proud….but it also makes me wonder…

Why do we only do this once a year?

Why are we only acolytes?

Why do we only have a handful of youth who serve as Eucharistic Ministers?

As our youth preacher pointed out in his sermon this past week, it is believed that the disciples of Jesus ranged between the ages of 12 and 18.  And what did they do?  They helped establish the largest religion in the entire world, with 2.2 billion followers.

Here at Holy Communion, you are considered a “youth” in the church when you are in grades 6 through 12.  The average 6^th grader is 12 and the average senior in high school is 18…  hmmm

Jesus started with 12 teenagers and changed the world…. We have 120, what can we do?  

God first, Fail Big

Well it is that time of the year again…graduations… end of school and the start of summer.

It is an oxymoronic time too.  We experience the joyful sadness of school ending and vacations starting. 

We enjoy the festive tranquility that this much needed break offers.    

Now instead of becoming redundant with my awfully good examples of oxymoronic phrases…

Speaking of oxymoron, who hear remembers the song Bitter Sweet Symphony by the Verve?  For some reason, this song always makes me think of graduation. 

This 1997 hit song really deals with something a think a lot of people deal with… being torn between taking a path you feel compelled to go down vs. a path you want to follow.

Whether this is about which college or school you want to go to, or what sport you want to play, what classes to take, what job to get… What drives us to make the decisions we make?

In today’s society, money seems to be a huge factor in the decisions we make.

This career will pay me more than that one.

This school is giving me more of a scholarship than that one.

But this makes me ask…is that right?!

When I was younger I KNEW what I wanted to do when I was older… 

For the longest time I just KNEW that I was going to the starting forward for the US National Soccer team.  I did the math and figured that by the age of 17 I would be able to play in 2006 World Cup in Germany.  Getting started so early would mean that I would then also be able to play in the 2010 and 2014 World Cups.  And naturally, since I was going to have a long career because I would just never suffer an injuries, I would then be able to play in the 2018 and 2022 World Cups and would be able to retire in my mid 30’s.  I had my whole life figured out.

But of course, I had to have a back-up plan….you know, just in case.  So I was going to the next Frank Lloyd Wright.  Because becoming one of the most recognizable, famous architects in the world.  But I was going to do him one better.  I wasn’t just going to design the buildings…I was also going to be a carpenter and physically build the houses I designed myself.

So there I was… 12 years old and I had my whole life figured out.

I loved playing soccer… so I was going to do that for a living.

I loved drawing and designing things…so I was going to do that for a living.

I loved making things and watching as things came together… so I was going to do that for a living.

As I was thinking back to this…I realized something…

Never, not for a second did that little 12 year old version of myself ever factor in money into my decisions.  It was not something I cared about.  I simply wanted to do something that I loved.

This morning I stumbled across a commencement speech given at Dillard University by the one and only Denzel Washington.

You can watch the whole video here,

 but some of the things he said are great things to keep in mind.

1.        1.  Put God first.  Especially for our youth that are heading off to college, this is extremely difficult.  I have mentioned this stat many times in the past.  Typically speaking 70-75% of high school youth who are active in youth group at a church will leave after graduation.  To put this in perspective, we just celebrated about 15 of our high school seniors.  Statistics say that in 4 years, only 4 of them will still be involved with a church.  As Denzel says, “…I didn’t always stick with Him, but He stuck with me.”  You may wander, but God will always be there.  Put God first in everything you do and remember that everything we have is because of the grace of God.

2.       

      2.   Fail Big.  When I first started at Holy Communion, I am not going to lie…I had no idea what I was doing.  They do not really have many classes that prepare you exactly what it is going to be like to be a youth minister.  You instantly become a logistics professional, a hype man, a therapists, a teacher, a preacher, a leader, a follower, a role model, a friend, a mentor, a marketing and advertisement agency, a write, a scholar, a finance officer…but one thing I was told was to just fail forward.  Everything you do will not always work out.  But take a lesson from everything you do and keep moving forward.  Don’t be afraid to fail…especially if you are dreaming big.

3.       

       3.    You never see a U-Haul behind a hearse.   About 2000 BC, the Egyptians built pyramids as tombs for the pharaohs and their queens.  In the rooms that they were buried, all of the belongings and wealth was buried in the room with their bodies.  They believed that they need there riches to support themselves in the afterlife.  That is not what we believe today.  When asked what he needed to do to follow Jesus, the rich young ruler was told that he must first give up all his possessions.  “It’s not how much you have, it’s what you do with it.”

4.      

      4.   Say thank you.  Behind every great person…is a group of people who have been there to support you and be there for you through thick and then.  Never forget that.  One of the most amazing things I have seen this past year is the sense of community in this youth group.  There is so much love in this group.  That group is and will be there for.  When you are down, look to them to hold you up.  “When you get it, reach back, pull someone else up.”  In a society that strives to be independent, break the mold.

Farewell Dinner

This past Sunday, all the youth gathered in the Youth Room for its final EYC of the semester.  For 8 of those present, it was there last time to be at EYC as a youth.

We gathered at a large banquet table to eat and to do what this group does best...just be with each other. 

Over the years, there has been a shift in this youth group.  It has gone from a program that has loved the outdoors, high energy games to something different.  It was not long ago that following every youth group event, the youth would go into the gym to play games, run around, and attempt to play half court knock-out (a very tiring game, I might add).

This past year has not been that way.  The popular games are no longer the games and the sporty events...they are the ones that just allow them to be with each other. 

This year I have been blown away by how much each member of this group just enjoys the company of everyone else.

Instead of going to the gym, they stay in the Youth Room and talk and hang out.  After they leave this, most of them go to Starbucks and continue to hang out.

We honored our seniors this past Sunday and allowed them each to share some of their favorite memories and to pass along some advice to the younger ones in youth group.

The overriding theme to what all of them said...

Just come.  They all seemed to share how the friendships they made at EYC were the ones they knew they could count on.  That it was a place they felt welcome no matter what was going on in their lives.

I have had a blast this past year and wish nothing but the best to our graduating seniors!

And my advice for everyone else...  just come...

The friendships I made during my time at youth group are still the ones that are most important to me today...even after 10 years.

Change the World

About 2 years ago, the History channel released a 10 part mini-series that covered the Bible, cover to cover.  So we have this book that covers the creation of the world…so 4.54 billion years ago…  the birth of Jesus…which takes place roughly 400 years after the Old Testament ends…  and the History channel was able to cover ALL of that in about 10 hours.

Ok, to be honest, they kind of left some stuff out and used their creative licenses to make it ready for TV…for some reason I have a hard time believing that the angels who lead Lot out of Sodom were actually armor wearing, sword wielding, ninja angels that fought their way out of the city in what looked like a Tarantino directed battle royal…but I was not there, so I could be wrong.

While much of the story has been altered and changed, there is one part of the series that stuck out to me when I watched it for the first time 2 years ago and is something I pops into my head every now and the…today was one of those days.

As I read the news reports and watched videos of the riots in Baltimore, I can’t help but think about how terribly sad it that there is so much violence in the world.  What can we do?  What should we do?  As a Christian, how should we respond to these situations?  What is the proper course of action when everything is against you and the world is not fair?

What should we do?

My answer…I honestly don’t know.  But it is times like this that I think back to this one line from the History Channel’s take on the Bible.

In episode 5, Jesus is beginning his ministry and calls Peter to give up his job as a fisherman and become a fisher of men… When you are asked to do something, we typically have the same question, it is probably the same question that Peter asks Jesus…”What are we going to do?”

How does Jesus respond?

“We are going to change the world.”

In a time where his people are opposed and poor, and enslaved… in a time that he is surrounded by violence…Jesus begins his ministry with the goal of changing the world.

Is that what we are stilled called to do today as a follower of Christ?  Change the world?  But how do we go about doing that?

Over the past few weeks I have been a part of many conversations regarding violence and fighting verse the concept of doing the right thing.

So one of the conversations I had dealt with violence in movies and how can we find God in film.  One movie that was really focused on was the new Batman series.  Was Batman a good person?

I think at first thought, we would all agree that is good.  A person who is doing whatever they can for the betterment of those around him.  But, I don’t recall anywhere in the Bible that it says, “He who is without sin, let him cast the first stone…unless you are super rich and are doing stuff that you think is best for the city, then beat up anyone who gets in your way.”

So what is worse…doing bad for the greater good…or standing idly by while bad things happen?

This made me think of Dietrich Bonhoeffer and his works on Romans 13.  Through his works, you can see a transformation in Bonhoeffer.  In one work early on in his ministry, he wrote in full support of Romans 13, saying that people should follow the law and authority because it is all of God and it is what the Bible tells us.  However, growing up in Germany during the 1930’s, he began to question this view.  He published another paper on Romans 13.  He still supported his previous argument but it had some stipulations and was not as confident as his first writing.  There was questions about what laws should you follow.  Finally, Bonhoeffer wrote a third paper on Romans 13.  This time he claimed that you should only follow the law if it is in accordance with God and if your authority is not bringing about the kingdom of God then you should do anything within your power to stop it.  Not only did Bonhoeffer just write these papers, he lived out his beliefs.  You can see a transformation as he witnessed the terrors and horrors of Holocaust and what the Nazi party was doing to his home country.  Ultimately, Bonhoeffer was martyred after plotting and attempting to assassinate Hitler.  We celebrate Bonhoeffer as a brilliant scholar, a great person, and someone that just about every single person in the church references at one point or another.

But, if we take a look at this…we remember him not only for his works…but for attempted murder…

This was brought up during our conversation on this subject…when is it ok to respond in violence, if ever?

Is that a fair time?  Would killing a person, even if it is Hitler, help grow the kingdom of God?

But then I can’t help but think that the 6^th commandment says to not murder…not do not murder, unless it is a really bad person.

I really struggle with wrapping my head around these concepts and wish I had an answer…I don’t.

While reflecting on this topic, I thought back to a sermon by Marcus Borg.  I wrote in this sermon before and have linked it below.  I recommend reading that post before continuing.    

http://youngsterstheology.blogspot.com/2014/09/an-eye-for-eye.html

So after thinking through all of this…I am still lost and confused…

As these conversations continued and got deeper, the clergy in the room was talking about responding in violence…they said they do not think murder is right or is ever yet and we should try to respond not in violence but in love…but if someone was harming their child they would not hesitate to shoot them if it meant saving their child.  I think that is something most people would agree with.

While trying to make sense of this all, I tried to relate it all to scripture.

The one story I thought of was when David became king and established the monarchy for the Israelites. 

The people build David, their new king, a huge house in honor of him.  His response was to offer to build a temple to God.  This man who God had told you can do ANYTHING!  Was tasked with establishing the kingdom on earth…this great warrior for God…but when he tries to build a temple to God…God says no…

God tells David….you cannot do that…

Wow. 

What was God’s reasoning?  David was a warrior king…God did not want his temple built under the terms of war and violence…

God waited until a time of peace and had his temple built by David’s son, Solomon.

So my question that followed this was…is violence sometimes necessary?

In thinking about Bonhoeffer, I don’t think he was wrong for attempting to assassinate Hitler…

Without the battles fought and won by David, would the Israelites have been able to establish their kingdom?

If Batman did not stand up and fight, then would the Joker and Bane or whoever wanted to do evil just have free reign over the city?

Is violence needed to help establish the kingdom of God?  Does violence help clear the way for the foundation of the kingdom?  Like David cleared the way for the temple to be built by Solomon?

I think if we go back and really look at the examples Borg brings up in my other post…we come to the answer of no…

Resist violence…resist evil….do what is right, but you can go about it without violence.  That was the message we receive from Jesus.

I leave you with a story I recently heard about responding to violence…

It was a Sunday morning at a church in downtown Memphis…as everyone was gathering and entering the church…a fight breaks out on the sidewalk just a little ways down the street.

How would you respond as a priest?  You are about to enter the church and lead your congregation in worship?  Yet, just outside your doors two people are in the middle of a violent fight that was beginning to attract a lot of attention…

What would you do?

Stop the fight?  Jump in and break it up?

Well, in this case, they chose to sing a hymn…

Just very loudly began singing a hymn just next to everyone who was at the fight…

You can imagine the response… lots of strange looks from people who are thinking “What is wrong with this person?”

Some people recognized the tune and actually began singing as well.  The other people simply walked away…

What if instead of responding to violence with violence…by physically trying to stop the bad things from happening…

We sing a hymn.  We literally praise God in the face of violence.

Respond to hate with love…

How different would the world be if we did that?

Optimism...Good for your Soul

As I sit here and reflect back n the events of this week, I am absolutely overwhelmed by the incredible ways that God has been present in just about everything that has happened.  From Youth Sunday to the Easter Vigil and everything in between…God presence was truly felt.

But if I had to say this at this same time exactly one week ago…It might have been a different story.

This past Sunday, one of our own youth, Baty, gave the sermon during Youth Sunday.  The second Sunday in Easter, the Gospel reading is usually the story of Doubting Thomas.  “Unless I see the mark of the nails in his hands, and put my finger in the mark of the nails and my hand in his side, I will not believe…” exclaims Thomas in the Gospel of John.

“Blessed are those that have not seen yet still have believed…” was how Baty began his sermon, which really made me think.

He continued on reflecting on the common everyday saying of, “I’ll believe it when I see it.”  But to him, that is a very pessimistic outlook. 

He used this cliché saying to faith.  Faith does not provide the luxury of certainty.  There is no proof…there are no nail holes.

Faith requires us to be optimistic.  We have look past the bad and the doubt and find belief within the uncertainty.

But sometimes, the bad can sometimes start to weigh on us… I experienced this just a week ago.

On Tuesday morning, I woke up and got ready for week just like any other day.  Took care of my dog, grabbed my stuff, and walked down the driveway to Fred (Fred is my car…yes I named my car). 

As I got closer to Fred, I noticed that there seemed to more a lot of stuff just thrown all over the seats.  At first I thought, “Wow, I really need to clean out my car!  It is even messier than I though.”

Which is generally true…my car is a mess most of the time.  However as I opened the door, I noticed that it was more than the usual mess…my glove box was hanging open, the center console was emptied, and everything that was once inside of them was strewn about the inside of my car.

It is not the first time I have had a car broken into, but that still doesn’t lessen that initial feeling you have when you realize that someone has invaded your property and gone through your belongings without regard for anything.   Luckily nothing major was missing, my cd’s, a bowling ball, all the change in the car…but still not the way I wanted to start my day.

I tried not to think about it during the day and go about my normal work.  I wanted to clear my head, so I went home about 30 minutes early and went for a bike ride.  Getting outside on a day when the weather is great always cheers me up.  Exercise helps relax me and clears my head.  It was turning out to be a pretty good day…until….

I took a trial I was unfamiliar with and thought connected to the road but instead dumped me out in the middle of a field….about a half mile from the road I needed to be on…

There was a muddy dirt trail I could take, but road bikes don’t handle muddy trials very well.  So I decided to walk it.

If you ever walked around wearing clipless bike shoes, then you know what I am talking about.  If you haven’t…imagine that bottom of your shoe is just a solid piece of wood…and right near the middle of your foot is a 1/2 inch chunk of metal that sticks straight down.

So there I am, trudging across this muddy field, carrying my bike, and I have time to think and reflect on the day…

I woke up and started my day with my car being broken into…bummer

And now I am walking uncomfortable through a corn field carrying a bike…bummer

What else could go wrong?

Right as I think this…POP!

The strap on my right shoe just snaps….the only thing that was holding the top part of the shoe down and keeping my foot in the shoe was no flapping in the air as I tried to take one more step…but failing…

I then stood there wearing one shoe, carrying my bike…with my broken shoe behind me in the mud, one sock slowly absorbing the moisture out of the mud that I was standing in, still a ways away from the road I needed to be on, thinking back to the events of that morning…

There was only one thing left to do…

I laughed.

This wasn’t a laugh to keep from crying kind of moment; I truly thought this moment was hilarious.

Even with all of that happening that day, looking back, I would still say I had a good day.

The more I thought about how and why I felt this way, I came back to a lesson I learned a long time ago.

There is always one thing you control in every situation…and that is how you respond to that situation. 

Things are going to happen…

Bad things, good things… you will fail a test one day, you won’t get that job you really wanted, the really cute guy will like someone else…

Everything will not always go your way… and you know what…that is ok.

If there is one thing you can learn from Thomas here it is that we ALL doubt!  We all have questions…we all want proof…we want to see the nail holes!

We think that is what it takes to keep our faith strong!  To see proof!

What if I argued the opposite…it is the doubt, the fear, the struggle that helps keep our faith strongest…

That those who never question their faith do not appreciate it as much as the one fights and struggles and works at it…

Success is counted sweetest

By those who ne’er succeed.

To comprehend a nectar.

Requires sorest need.

Not one of all the purple Host

Who took the Flag today

Can tell the definition

So clear of victory

As he defeated – dying –

On whose forbidden ear

The distant strains of triumph

Burst agonized and clear!

-Emily Dickinson

So what do we do during these times of doubt, loss, failure, questioning, confusion…

That is when we have to exactly what Baty said…be an optimist.  Find the good and respond positively even when doubt and darkness try to shut out the light.

Only thing you can always control is how you respond.